Things that make you p*ss yourself laughing

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Dinglebutt

| 11,949 posts


8th Oct 2014 at 10:00 pm

Dinglebutt - I aim to misbehave

I aim to misbehave

 
*playing a Sporcle quiz on the ipad*

"Complete the TV show: __________ in Philadelphia"

... in Philadelphia? What the f*ck could that be?

*looks at TV and remembers I have It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia playing in the background*
Mal: Appears we got here just in the nick of time. What does that make us?
Zoë: Big damn heroes, sir.
Mal: Ain't we just.

Rayanne Graff

| 76,001 posts


18th Oct 2014 at 8:17 am

Rayanne Graff - River Phoenix

River Phoenix

 

Rayanne Graff

| 76,001 posts


18th Oct 2014 at 12:28 pm

Rayanne Graff - River Phoenix

River Phoenix

 
Sausage meat and black pudding pie tends to make me feel [smilie_barf.gif] rather than .
*[http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/uploads/549604.jpg]*

Rayanne Graff

| 76,001 posts


22nd Oct 2014 at 11:28 am

Rayanne Graff - River Phoenix

River Phoenix

 

Πανδώρα

| 15,328 posts


22nd Oct 2014 at 11:47 pm

 Πανδώρα -

 
Quote: the doc, Oct 2014
Quote: Rayanne Graff, Sept 2014
Yesterday, i said to Marc: i like words that begin with p, like pulchritudinous. Except i ended up saying pies instead of p.


When I were in Whitby I went to the pie and mash shop for lunch and got one stuffed to the top with sausage meat and black pudding. Most Northern pie ever


gotta say, that sounds f*cking amazing...
*burp*

Rayanne Graff

| 76,001 posts


26th Oct 2014 at 1:57 pm

Rayanne Graff - River Phoenix

River Phoenix

 
i was just looking at an old thread from another forum that i post on. There was a post that included the phrase "Get out for a walk". However, i misread walk as w*nk.
*[http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/uploads/549604.jpg]*

Rayanne Graff

| 76,001 posts


13th Nov 2014 at 10:51 pm

Rayanne Graff - River Phoenix

River Phoenix

 

Dinglebutt

| 11,949 posts


19th Nov 2014 at 9:47 am

Dinglebutt - I aim to misbehave

I aim to misbehave

 
Quoting myself, but f*ck you!

Boss: (talking about stamp collecting) ... self-adhesive stamps are the bane of stamp collectors lives
Me: ... because you don't get to lick them?
Mal: Appears we got here just in the nick of time. What does that make us?
Zoë: Big damn heroes, sir.
Mal: Ain't we just.

Rayanne Graff

| 76,001 posts


19th Nov 2014 at 10:49 am

Rayanne Graff - River Phoenix

River Phoenix

 
i was watching the news this morning and they mentioned something about a nurse having Ebola. But i misheard nurse as nerd.
*[http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/uploads/549604.jpg]*

Rayanne Graff

| 76,001 posts


11th Dec 2014 at 5:43 pm

Rayanne Graff - River Phoenix

River Phoenix

 
i was watching Coach Trip a few minutes ago and they had two new contestants. They were called Tommy and Darren. And when they appeared, a song was played on the programme. The song was MMMBop.

Edited by Rayanne Graff Dec 2014
*[http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/uploads/549604.jpg]*

Dinglebutt

| 11,949 posts


8th Jan 2015 at 3:01 pm

Dinglebutt - I aim to misbehave

I aim to misbehave

 
Boss: We were going to go see Exodus, but Rotten Tomato only gave it 22%
Workmate: Out of a hundred?
Boss: Yeah... 22%...
Workmate: Yeah but... out of a hundred?

Mal: Appears we got here just in the nick of time. What does that make us?
Zoë: Big damn heroes, sir.
Mal: Ain't we just.

Rayanne Graff

| 76,001 posts


12th Jan 2015 at 5:28 pm

Rayanne Graff - River Phoenix

River Phoenix

 
A few hours ago, Marc and I were in the kitchen and he was about to make us hot drinks. So he asked me if I wanted one of the cherry-flavoured drinking chocolate packets and I said summat about wanting to have one of the packets another time. And then he said Are you saving your cherry?.
*[http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/uploads/549604.jpg]*

Dinglebutt

| 11,949 posts


21st Jan 2015 at 2:22 pm

Dinglebutt - I aim to misbehave

I aim to misbehave

 
Quote: Captain Mal Reynolds, Jan 2015
Boss: We were going to go see Exodus, but Rotten Tomato only gave it 22%
Workmate: Out of a hundred?
Boss: Yeah... 22%...
Workmate: Yeah but... out of a hundred?



Oh my god... the same f*cking guy today while we were talking about NFL

Me: The game goes on for over 3 hours, even though each quarter only has 15 minutes of actual game time.
Workmate: How many quarters are there?

QUARTERS! THEY'RE QUARTERS!
Mal: Appears we got here just in the nick of time. What does that make us?
Zoë: Big damn heroes, sir.
Mal: Ain't we just.

Rayanne Graff

| 76,001 posts


22nd Jan 2015 at 9:09 pm

Rayanne Graff - River Phoenix

River Phoenix

 
Marc was talking about his niece and his nephew. * He meant to say that they live in a small world. But he ended up saying smelly world.

* Well, one of his nieces and one of his nephews.
*[http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/uploads/549604.jpg]*

Rayanne Graff

| 76,001 posts


22nd Jan 2015 at 9:10 pm

Rayanne Graff - River Phoenix

River Phoenix

 
Quote: Captain Mal Reynolds, Jan 2015
Quote: Captain Mal Reynolds, Jan 2015
Boss: We were going to go see Exodus, but Rotten Tomato only gave it 22%
Workmate: Out of a hundred?
Boss: Yeah... 22%...
Workmate: Yeah but... out of a hundred?



Oh my god... the same f*cking guy today while we were talking about NFL

Me: The game goes on for over 3 hours, even though each quarter only has 15 minutes of actual game time.
Workmate: How many quarters are there?

QUARTERS! THEY'RE QUARTERS!


Wow, and i thought i was sh*t at maths.
*[http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/uploads/549604.jpg]*

Rayanne Graff

| 76,001 posts


6th Mar 2015 at 9:41 am

Rayanne Graff - River Phoenix

River Phoenix

 

Dinglebutt

| 11,949 posts


23rd Mar 2015 at 11:42 am

Dinglebutt - I aim to misbehave

I aim to misbehave

 
The most Irish Irish to have ever Irished:

Quote:
The bridge has not always been the source of tragedy, the evening of the 18th of May 1969 is fondly remembered by many of the community when a truck laden with Bushmills and Cream of Barley Whiskey was traveling from Antrim to Dublin when its brakes failed coming down the hill and it rolled over the bridge wall into the river some 3 meters or so below, the driver survived and was brought to Hospital but the entire loot of liquor was strewn across the river bottom. Most of the town of Slane were quick on the scene, vans and truck were seen spiriting away from the wreck of the truck in the dead of night. Several prosecutions followed, the actual quantity of whiskey taken away is still known only to the management of Bushmills and perhaps to the Insurance Company that followed up the claim. The following day five Irish Divers, Brian Cusack, Sean Sheridan, Joe Murray, Fergus McKenna and Sean Donohoe arrived and while the local people of Slane were still dredging for bottles they collected 408 bottles in total, the local butcher in Slane at the time was apparently still drinking Bushmills Whiskey four years later.
Mal: Appears we got here just in the nick of time. What does that make us?
Zoë: Big damn heroes, sir.
Mal: Ain't we just.

Rayanne Graff

| 76,001 posts


4th Apr 2015 at 8:06 am

Rayanne Graff - River Phoenix

River Phoenix

 
Yesterday, Marc and I were talking about how he often makes speeches. Marc said I should join Speeches Anonymous. Then I said They'd probably throw you out for talking too much.
*[http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/uploads/549604.jpg]*

Rayanne Graff

| 76,001 posts


7th Apr 2015 at 5:31 pm

Rayanne Graff - River Phoenix

River Phoenix

 
Yesterday, Marc and i were watching an episode of The Big Bang Theory. There was a pause in the programme and Marc farted. So i said As you always say to me, your timing is impeccable.
*[http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/uploads/549604.jpg]*

Rayanne Graff

| 76,001 posts


7th Apr 2015 at 5:32 pm

Rayanne Graff - River Phoenix

River Phoenix

 
*[http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/uploads/549604.jpg]*

Dinglebutt

| 11,949 posts


23rd Apr 2015 at 8:42 am

Dinglebutt - I aim to misbehave

I aim to misbehave

 
The guy I work with just pronounced "pronunciation" wrong
Mal: Appears we got here just in the nick of time. What does that make us?
Zoë: Big damn heroes, sir.
Mal: Ain't we just.

Rayanne Graff

| 76,001 posts


27th Apr 2015 at 2:40 pm

Rayanne Graff - River Phoenix

River Phoenix

 
i live near a house called Cobweb Cottage. Marc commented on it today and i said Yes, a family of goths live there. Marc believed me for a few seconds. i wasn't expecting that as i thought he'd realise i was trying to be imaginative.
*[http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/uploads/549604.jpg]*

Rayanne Graff

| 76,001 posts


27th Apr 2015 at 2:40 pm

Rayanne Graff - River Phoenix

River Phoenix

 
Quote: Captain Mal Reynolds, Apr 2015
The guy I work with just pronounced "pronunciation" wrong


Wow, how did he pronounce it?
*[http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/uploads/549604.jpg]*

Dinglebutt

| 11,949 posts


28th Apr 2015 at 4:43 pm

Dinglebutt - I aim to misbehave

I aim to misbehave

 
Quote: Rayanne Graff, Apr 2015
Quote: Captain Mal Reynolds, Apr 2015
The guy I work with just pronounced "pronunciation" wrong


Wow, how did he pronounce it?


It was like "Prawn-on-say-tion"
Mal: Appears we got here just in the nick of time. What does that make us?
Zoë: Big damn heroes, sir.
Mal: Ain't we just.

oatibix

| 36 posts


10th May 2015 at 7:04 am

 
You hear a lot of "pronounciation" for that word too.
buy oatibix
eat oatibix
have oatibix

Rayanne Graff

| 76,001 posts


6th Jun 2015 at 4:44 pm

Rayanne Graff - River Phoenix

River Phoenix

 
Yesterday, Marc had a text from one of his sisters and she asked if we were watching the Maniacs (sic).
*[http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/uploads/549604.jpg]*

Dinglebutt

| 11,949 posts


13th Jun 2015 at 10:49 pm

Dinglebutt - I aim to misbehave

I aim to misbehave

 
Quote: the doc, Jun 2015
Posted two new bits of writing on my site last week. One of them is called A Few Words On Missing the Chance To Disprove the Existence Of God, Or, How I Nearly Flipped Off A Nun. Got a comment from someone caiming to be an ex-nun who said she used to flip people off all the time


Sounds like a bad habit!

WAHHAY!
Mal: Appears we got here just in the nick of time. What does that make us?
Zoë: Big damn heroes, sir.
Mal: Ain't we just.

Rayanne Graff

| 76,001 posts


18th Jun 2015 at 3:26 pm

Rayanne Graff - River Phoenix

River Phoenix

 
Is that why you said our kid in the shoutbox?
*[http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/uploads/549604.jpg]*

Dinglebutt

| 11,949 posts


19th Jun 2015 at 7:29 pm

Dinglebutt - I aim to misbehave

I aim to misbehave

 
Quote: the doc, Jun 2015
Quote: Captain Mal Reynolds, Jun 2015
Quote: the doc, Jun 2015
Posted two new bits of writing on my site last week. One of them is called A Few Words On Missing the Chance To Disprove the Existence Of God, Or, How I Nearly Flipped Off A Nun. Got a comment from someone caiming to be an ex-nun who said she used to flip people off all the time


Sounds like a bad habit!

WAHHAY!


You ever seen Bad Habits? Totally frazzled Spanish film by Pedro Almadovar.


I'm guessing I haven't, because the first thing that came to mind was Robbie Coltrane dressed as a nun which was obviously Nuns On The Run
Mal: Appears we got here just in the nick of time. What does that make us?
Zoë: Big damn heroes, sir.
Mal: Ain't we just.

Rayanne Graff

| 76,001 posts


14th Aug 2015 at 5:37 pm

Rayanne Graff - River Phoenix

River Phoenix

 
Quote: the doc, Jun 2015
Quote: Rayanne Graff, Jun 2015
Is that why you said our kid in the shoutbox?


Fraid not, dear Straws. I call loads of people it.


i've never called anyone Our kid. But then i am a bit middle class.
*[http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/uploads/549604.jpg]*

Rayanne Graff

| 76,001 posts


14th Aug 2015 at 5:50 pm

Rayanne Graff - River Phoenix

River Phoenix

 
Yesterday, i was looking at the TV episodes descriptions with the remote control. One of them referred to Judge John Deed as The thinking woman's hunk. i thought that was funny as i think hunk is a funny word.
*[http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/uploads/549604.jpg]*

Dinglebutt

| 11,949 posts


1st Sept 2015 at 11:16 am

Dinglebutt - I aim to misbehave

I aim to misbehave

 
The idiot who used to work with us updated his LinkedIn profile

"Building Surveyor Seeking Oppurtunties"

That pretty much sums him up to be honest
Mal: Appears we got here just in the nick of time. What does that make us?
Zoë: Big damn heroes, sir.
Mal: Ain't we just.

Rayanne Graff

| 76,001 posts


1st Sept 2015 at 5:36 pm

Rayanne Graff - River Phoenix

River Phoenix

 
i was at the dentist's today and i heard the receptionist on the phone to someone that wanted an appointment. She gave the person on the phone an appointment for 2.30.

i told Marc about that and then i had to explain why 2.30 is funny in a dental context.

Also, when my dentist was talking to me, she used the phrase "elbow grease". Which was weird as i haven't heard anyone say "elbow grease" for years. And perhaps also because my dentist is Italian.

Edit: Huh, the narrator on today's episode of Come Dine with Me said Elbow grease.

Edited by Rayanne Graff Sept 2015
*[http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/uploads/549604.jpg]*

Dinglebutt

| 11,949 posts


2nd Sept 2015 at 11:09 am

Dinglebutt - I aim to misbehave

I aim to misbehave

 
Quote: Rayanne Graff, Sept 2015
i was at the dentist's today and i heard the receptionist on the phone to someone that wanted an appointment. She gave the person on the phone an appointment for 2.30.

i told Marc about that and then i had to explain why 2.30 is funny in a dental context.


It's amazing how many people have never heard that. It's like not knowing you're supposed to say "Who's there?" when someone says "Knock Knock"
Mal: Appears we got here just in the nick of time. What does that make us?
Zoë: Big damn heroes, sir.
Mal: Ain't we just.

Rayanne Graff

| 76,001 posts


4th Sept 2015 at 5:03 pm

Rayanne Graff - River Phoenix

River Phoenix

 
Today, i was in the queue in a shop. Call the Shots by Girls Aloud was on the radio and the man behind me started singing along. He didn't know many of the words so he was mostly singing Der der der and Ooh ooh ooh.
*[http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/uploads/549604.jpg]*


 
 
IGH: Just who was The Brigadier
ratammer: squeak
IGH: Wibble
Vel: *sigh*
Emma: Hi VR...
Princess Psycho: Hi I am back in the UK so how are everyone been keeping. Has Fluffy had that little accident yet?
Claire: SHOUTBOX OF VRRRRRR
Rayanne Graff: Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.
Lucozade Lover: Happy New Year!
Crinkle-Cut Beatroot: Happy new year <3
Claire: BOXSHOUT
Rayanne Graff: Happy Easter.
Emma: So… Posting a new thread is Fission Mailing… so I’m putting this here.
Emma: I know there aren’t many people looking at this anymore… but I have made the decision to stop paying for the VR hosting and to let the domain lapse.
Emma: I think it will be going offline around the end of May
Emma: It’s been almost 10 years since James passed away… and I feel like it’s time.
Emma: A lot of the regulars can be found on the VR veterans group on Facebook - if you see this and you’re not in there, come join us.
Crinkle-Cut Beatroot: What's the facebook group called? I couldn't find it...

 

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