Diary of a Lewis

This is an idea a while ago and posted on another forum. It's really just a diary of a particularly unusual chap by the name of Lewis, who gets up to the most insane adventures and meets the most wacky characters and other such crap. Anyways, I have decided to try and start posting these to Zine so the teletextual world can see them all and rejoice. So, first of all do people actually think letters of this nature will get printed and is it a good idea. Feel free to join in the fantasising of this unique entity with your own letters.

The first few entries.

Day One

Cor blimey, my first diary. Why haven't I thought of this before? Oh yeah, I've not been allowed rational thought the past 15 years cos of the the lithium. But that's all in the past now. They'll never catch me. Tee hee. Oh what exploits I shall have. What mirth I shall get up to. What charges they will hold me for. Look forward to it all in this diary.

Lewis Gum Drops

Day Two

Oh what incidents paraded my life today diary. Well first of all, I got up numerous hours late due to my sister's hilarious prank of taking the batteries out the alarm. And not only that, but 5 minutes later I opened my bedroom door only to find my mother hanging from the ceiling. Talk about a bad start to the day. Oh well, laters

Lewis Gum Drops

Day Three

Well thankfully that whole 'mother killing herself cos she's sick of life and me' turned out to be just another practical joke. Cor blimey, I do haved the most BONKERS family. They'd even got the perfect amount of body fluid on the floor. Talk about perfectionists. Don't worry, I got them back in the end for making me look a right plonker – I punched them both in the face and stole their money.

Lewis Gum Drops

Day Four

Another day of ridiculous proportions today diary. But where to start? Somewhere in the middle I think for I am Lewis and I am great and I don't adhere to the laws of time and rationality. Anyway, so I got out the spaceship, covered in viscera and bile, only to see the evil puppet nemesis again, leering at my new found breasts. I'll end here.

Lewis Gum Drops