25^th April 2024, 9:53 pm

Forum Gallery Archives Members

Let's trim our hair in accordance with the socialist lifestyle

Mega-Zine: Unseen Footage and Alternative Takes

Posted In: Mega-Zine Chat. Reading This Thread:

Topper

| 6,773 posts

18^th Apr 2005 at 1:56 pm

Dismantling a person is sometimes necessary...

Rennaps

How do your rennaps work, WLW? Got the 'Japes and kick-backs' mod yet? Nah man, I'm telling you big style, you need some Clarky Cats or a dose of revolting platt. Get over it, loser.

Topper

I can't be bothered to make any sense with 'Zine letters any more, I may as well disappear up my own passage, it seems the only way to be a part, but not be a part. Even that won't have made any sense.

I hope some day, for some reason, David Duchovny is investigated by the FBI. Because that would make a great story.

http://www.myspace.com/toppercutter

Topper

| 6,773 posts

18^th Apr 2005 at 2:16 pm

Dismantling a person is sometimes necessary...

Whether that's true or not, I was simply saying I can't seem to write coherently or sensically of late, so I'm just going to go with the flow, so to speak.

I hope some day, for some reason, David Duchovny is investigated by the FBI. Because that would make a great story.

http://www.myspace.com/toppercutter

Dinglebutt

| 11,949 posts

19^th Apr 2005 at 8:18 am

I aim to misbehave

I found it funny, you've never made sense to me alex, so keep up the good work

Mal: Appears we got here just in the nick of time. What does that make us?
Zoë: Big damn heroes, sir.
Mal: Ain't we just.

Elusive Moose

| 8,546 posts

21^st Apr 2005 at 10:47 pm

Get your Antlers on

I've only just sent this, but I'm thinking it won't get on:

Bouncy Brothels

When talking to another Ziner about why men are attracted to breasts, the answer appeared to be that they were wiggly and bouncy. Which gave birth to this idea:

Brothels in bouncy castles! It would be the most erotic thing ever, combining men's favourite things; bounce, wiggly things and err, not so wiggly things. Supposedly.

Why has nobody ever thought of this before?!

My Mother would be so proud.

The Elusive Moose

"You can't roast infants. You just don't get away with it."- a life lesson for us all.

Wife of Phil the Lawful Hippo. Imagine the children!

The Disneyafied Adventures of Me

Topper

| 6,773 posts

22^nd Apr 2005 at 8:01 am

Dismantling a person is sometimes necessary...

I doubt that will get on in its current state...unfortunately....

I hope some day, for some reason, David Duchovny is investigated by the FBI. Because that would make a great story.

http://www.myspace.com/toppercutter

Elusive Moose

| 8,546 posts

23^rd Apr 2005 at 5:20 pm

Get your Antlers on

Quote: Rennaps_

I doubt that will get on in its current state...unfortunately....

I wasn't really expecting it to. If it does it'll probably get edited down to 'Men's favourite things: bounce and wiggly things. My mother would be so proud' or something like that.

So if I put 'bouncy castle made of jaffa cakes' and added 'food' to one of men's favourite things then it might get printed

"You can't roast infants. You just don't get away with it."- a life lesson for us all.

Wife of Phil the Lawful Hippo. Imagine the children!

The Disneyafied Adventures of Me

Freshly Squeezed Cynic

| 6,189 posts

26^th Apr 2005 at 9:47 pm

apparently the big pink bastard is me

No. 1 candidate for never getting printed:

Funny

So, seeing as we have to be funny to be printed, what's Emma's schtick? Do you find her funny in an ironic sense, as in you can't believe the mindless tripe spewing from her vapid mouth, or in a pityable sense, like a puppy who's been kicked and is trying to walk across a busy road?

Freshly Squeezed Cynic.

Filled with existential dread and toast.

Chris Kamara

| 24,049 posts

26^th Apr 2005 at 10:39 pm

ahahaha, bravo.

obviously it wont be printed, but i'll live in hope.

Dinglebutt

| 11,949 posts

27^th Apr 2005 at 7:52 am

I aim to misbehave

haha, brilliant. Like you both said, wont get printed, but brilliant nonetheless

Mal: Appears we got here just in the nick of time. What does that make us?
Zoë: Big damn heroes, sir.
Mal: Ain't we just.

JM

| 8,289 posts

27^th Apr 2005 at 2:22 pm

Live in hope, it could get on. If you get the sarcy one anyway.

Dinglebutt

| 11,949 posts

27^th Apr 2005 at 3:05 pm

I aim to misbehave

dont worry, im working on a plan. we'll soon know a lot more about emma.... MWAHAHAHAHA

Mal: Appears we got here just in the nick of time. What does that make us?
Zoë: Big damn heroes, sir.
Mal: Ain't we just.

ANBY v3.0

| 7,728 posts

27^th Apr 2005 at 3:13 pm

Officially female according to Pamplemeese Decree.

oooh, I like plans. Can I have in?

Rupert didn't win the Best Signature Award. He does not exist.

Dinglebutt

| 11,949 posts

27^th Apr 2005 at 3:17 pm

I aim to misbehave

one man mission im afraid, if it works, we'll know if emma and WLW know each other, or emma will humiliate herself. Its gonna be good either way

Mal: Appears we got here just in the nick of time. What does that make us?
Zoë: Big damn heroes, sir.
Mal: Ain't we just.

ANBY v3.0

| 7,728 posts

27^th Apr 2005 at 3:20 pm

Officially female according to Pamplemeese Decree.

Ah, okay then. Good luck on your mission *salutes*

Rupert didn't win the Best Signature Award. He does not exist.

Chris Kamara

| 24,049 posts

27^th Apr 2005 at 7:02 pm

i already know her rather well. she doesn't 'know' wlw because as far as i know, there is no set one. she knows a few people from teletext who helped her have a few things arranged but nothing more. she's a nice enough girl outside zine, if a little 'out-there'. no doubt she's the main reason zine is cack, however, but i've a feeling it would be anyway.

Dinglebutt

| 11,949 posts

28^th Apr 2005 at 8:26 am

I aim to misbehave

thanks for making me feel guilty martin, now i dont know whether or not to go ahead with my plan

Mal: Appears we got here just in the nick of time. What does that make us?
Zoë: Big damn heroes, sir.
Mal: Ain't we just.

Topper

| 6,773 posts

28^th Apr 2005 at 9:05 am

Dismantling a person is sometimes necessary...

Emma and I used to e-mail each other back in't day from time to time. All I remember from the few e-mails that were sent was her asking me if I thought she was a good 'Ziner, in other words being typically self-important. Guiltily though, as the tone of the e-mails had been friendly, I held back my true feelings and fobbed her off with something like "they're not my cup of tea, but...".

Anywho, that was before her letters really started to annoy me, anyway. Beforehand, all she wrote about was Charlie from Busted, which, whilst annoying, didn't p*ss me off. Her current "I'm a DJ on radio, hear me roar" letters drive me insane. She really does write the most annoying letters ever known to man, I even felt happy to see Spiky Stuy on yesterday, as at least him being on that page meant she couldn't be.

So, erm, yeah...

I hope some day, for some reason, David Duchovny is investigated by the FBI. Because that would make a great story.

http://www.myspace.com/toppercutter

Chris Kamara

| 24,049 posts

28^th Apr 2005 at 9:29 am

Quote: Paddy_Irishman_

thanks for making me feel guilty martin, now i dont know whether or not to go ahead with my plan

her destruction of zine renders your guilt meaningless. proceed with the plan!

and i agree with what alex said, whateverrrrr.

Dinglebutt

| 11,949 posts

28^th Apr 2005 at 3:38 pm

I aim to misbehave

alrighty, but i'll need her email address, if anyone out there has it, pm it to me please

Mal: Appears we got here just in the nick of time. What does that make us?
Zoë: Big damn heroes, sir.
Mal: Ain't we just.

Dinglebutt

| 11,949 posts

11^th May 2005 at 9:53 am

I aim to misbehave

The Paddy Show

ME: So Emma-the-lil-angel, How are you?
EMMA: Not good. I've just realised that no celebrity will ever fancy
me, I have awful taste in music, and I'm quite boring
ME: Aww, don't be so hard on yourself, that's what we're here for
EMMA: Did you just insult me or compliment me?
ME: Insult

Paddy Irishman

Hasnt been printed

The Paddy Show

ME: My next guest is the brilliant, Smerker!
Smerker: I'd like to point out, Paddy, that brilliant only just describes me
ME: Ok, so how have you been lately?
Smerker: I've been selling magic beans to strange youths with cows.
Quite a profit to be made.
ME: Chavs, they'll even buy Burberry magic beans. Gotta love those chavs

Paddy Irishman

Hasnt been printed

Ban this sick Filth

While watching my two young cousins, they had Balamory on the telly in the background. While it was on, I heard a woman on it say: "Don't worry Archie, I'm sure we'll be able to find someone who can help you play with your instrument"

With the Elections coming up, I'll be voting for whichever party bans this sick filth!

Paddy Irishman

Not printed either

Im starting to get paranoid

Mal: Appears we got here just in the nick of time. What does that make us?
Zoë: Big damn heroes, sir.
Mal: Ain't we just.

Topper

| 6,773 posts

19^th May 2005 at 2:08 pm

Dismantling a person is sometimes necessary...

I don't think this is going to be printed:

Cure

Got a rash on your hips? Coldsore on your back?
Mumps in your humps? Good, I'm glad, as now I can
astound you with my "Cure For Everything". It's
simple really, I combine the flavoured charm of
Strawberry Calpol with the heady brew that is Lemsip;
the result? 'Lemberry Calsip'.

E-mail me at www.e-mailaddress.com @yahoo.org for
details.

Topper

I hope some day, for some reason, David Duchovny is investigated by the FBI. Because that would make a great story.

http://www.myspace.com/toppercutter

Dinglebutt

| 11,949 posts

23^rd May 2005 at 8:43 am

I aim to misbehave

dont see why it shouldnt be printed, I didnt see anything wrong with it.

Arrogance

Arrogance is defined as - Having or displaying a sense of overbearing self-worth or self-importance.

Emma-the-lil-angel is arrogant. You WLW, are also arrogant, but in a different way. A much scarier way, involving a will, a haunted house and Vanessa Feltz dressed like one of the girls from Tatu.

Whatever happened to them?

Paddy Irishman

Now see, thisis definately not going to be printed

Mal: Appears we got here just in the nick of time. What does that make us?
Zoë: Big damn heroes, sir.
Mal: Ain't we just.

Dinglebutt

| 11,949 posts

24^th May 2005 at 8:34 am

I aim to misbehave

my letter was meant to be:

Reading

I don't know how some people can read on the bus. All the bumpy roads,
the book shaking all over the place, words jumping up and down before
your eyes. Yet some people read books like The DaVinci Code, and Harry
Potter on the bus. It's amazing.

I can't even get past the third page of The Sun without my head throbbing.

Paddy Irishman

Whats the point of taking away the funniest part of the letter... then printing it? It means that you print an unfunny letter. Now I have yet another unfunny letter to my name

Who the hell found "I cant even read The Sun without getting a headache funny"?

Mal: Appears we got here just in the nick of time. What does that make us?
Zoë: Big damn heroes, sir.
Mal: Ain't we just.

Dinglebutt

| 11,949 posts

24^th May 2005 at 9:31 am

I aim to misbehave

like i said before, maybe we should stop writing things that have a good chance of being edited, and concentrate on the letter quality

That being said, i did just send a letter which may not get printed

Mal: Appears we got here just in the nick of time. What does that make us?
Zoë: Big damn heroes, sir.
Mal: Ain't we just.

Freshly Squeezed Cynic

| 6,189 posts

8^th Jun 2005 at 10:31 pm

apparently the big pink bastard is me

Did this ever get printed?

Quips

My last letter was a quip at Emma? No, of course not. It was quite obviously an investigative expose of political and religious corruption in southern Addis Ababa, with detailed references to ties to the Russian mafia and trade in illegal narcotics with the Japanese yakuza.

You heard it here first.

Freshly Squeezed Cynic.

And I've lost all hope for this one.

Internet.

The Internet. Research tool of research tools. The greatest distraction since the invention of certain pictures by the Victorians, who had to release that repression somehow. Although, frequently the two mix, enhancing the fun.

Anyway, I'm going to post something and then keep refreshing until I get a reply. You may scoff, but secretly we all do it. Much like certain pictures.

Freshly Squeezed Cynic.

Filled with existential dread and toast.

Big nose strikes again

| 2,343 posts

9^th Jun 2005 at 4:48 pm

I sent in - 'keep things as they are - join the sado-masochists party'

still waiting.

[

Colin

| 10,038 posts

12^th Jun 2005 at 3:51 pm

I don't expect this to be shown. Well, I don't expect it to be shown intact, anyway.

Subject line: Actually...
Message content:
WLW, readers, Phillip, I have a confession.

I am not a whirlpool of extraordinary size or violence containing those who take or advocate the taking of law enforcement into their own hands.

I am actually a 14 year old boy called Colin from Newcastle-Under-Lyme.

Hah, I'm just joshing you!

Vigilante Maelstrom

http://www.myspace.com/papertruth
[http://www.vegetablerevolution.co.uk/resources/uploads/gerrard.jpg]

Hathor_the_bull

| 46 posts

16^th Jun 2005 at 10:20 am

mmm arm porn

My one and only letter to zine was:
Ah ha I've solved it!
WLW is acctually a car numberplate from my street,as cars can't write his pet haddok writes the"hillarious" replies to our letters.
It was never printed,so I got paranoid that I sent it to the wrong email address and tried to send it to club 140(That's how long ago it was!),and promptly got an angry letter back from Kim Dawson...

Help!!!Killer toenailclippers from mars!!!
Visit my other site:
http://www.geocities.com/rabbit777666/ bandsthatrock.html

JM

| 8,289 posts

18^th Jun 2005 at 11:50 am

mmm yes. I'm sure she was WLW for a bit.

Hathor_the_bull

| 46 posts

20^th Jun 2005 at 12:40 pm

mmm arm porn

As far as I rember It went somthing like this:
I have discovered the true identity of WLW.He is a car in my street and as cars can't write his pet haddok write the "witty" replies to our letters.
I tottaly understand why it wasn't printed now...

Help!!!Killer toenailclippers from mars!!!
Visit my other site:
http://www.geocities.com/rabbit777666/ bandsthatrock.html

Πανδώρα: Beefy cheesemas to all, and to all a gravy brie

Rayanne Graff: Happy Easter.

IGH: Just who was The Brigadier

ratammer: squeak

Debs|OWA: o/

IGH: Wibble

Vel: *sigh*

Emma: Hi VR...

Princess Psycho: Hi I am back in the UK so how are everyone been keeping. Has Fluffy had that little accident yet?

Claire: SHOUTBOX OF VRRRRRR

Rayanne Graff: Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.

Lucozade Lover: Happy New Year!

Crinkle-Cut Beatroot: Happy new year <3

Claire: BOXSHOUT

Rayanne Graff: Happy Easter.

Emma: So… Posting a new thread is Fission Mailing… so I’m putting this here.

Emma: I know there aren’t many people looking at this anymore… but I have made the decision to stop paying for the VR hosting and to let the domain lapse.

Emma: I think it will be going offline around the end of May

Emma: It’s been almost 10 years since James passed away… and I feel like it’s time.

Emma: A lot of the regulars can be found on the VR veterans group on Facebook - if you see this and you’re not in there, come join us.

Page: