Things that i have overheard while out walking.

"It felt like I shat out a Snickers".

Quote: Rayanne Graff, Aug 2014

i was in the city centre today and i heard a woman and man arguing. i think that everyone could hear them.

She called him a c**t. Then he said You sh*gged your brother. Then he said You f**ked your brother. Then he said It's your brother's baby.

Jesus Christ. Where were you walking, Retard Central Station?!

Anyroad, here are some more things that i've overheard.

A few weeks ago, i was in WH Smith and i was waiting for Marc as we'd arranged to meet there. He was late so i wandered around for a bit. Then i heard a man talking to another man. The first man started talking about Waterstones and how an old woman had been there and i think he said she'd been injured. The second man left and then the first man started talking to a woman. The man said I'm staying at someone's house at the moment. I try just to sit there and not get in anyone's way. And I don't do the cooking. That's how I was brought up. Later, the man said to the woman I have a girlfriend and she's a lot younger than me. Yes, I suppose that I'm like Mick Jagger.

A couple of weeks ago, i was in WH Smith again and there was a woman and a boy. The woman was old so perhaps she was his great-aunt or grandmother. They were looking at Minesweeper books and the woman seemed to think that some of the books were too old for the boy. The boy mentioned something about a buy one get one free offer but the woman seemed to dismiss that. And then she said something about Father C-mas. Even though it was only July. Still, i did once surprise a builder when he overheard me mention C-mas to Marc in May of 2013.

On Tuesday, i was in Tesco with Marc. There were two men that worked there. One said It's a cartoon. Then the other said It's not a cartoon. It's The White Album.

On Thursday, i was in the city centre and a boy/ young man said to a man It's going to be in Spain. I wish they'd hold it somewhere else.

Also on Thursday, i was walking back and i was on the pavement. A man was on a mobility scooter and another man was in a car. The man in the car said I'll have to drop you off here. I can't go near the orange thing.

Quote: Jewbacca, Aug 2014

Shouldn't the thread title be "Things that i have barryheard while out barrying"?

Thanks. I felt a bit awkward bringing it up myself.

Quote: Captain Mal Reynolds, Aug 2014

Quote: Jewbacca, Aug 2014

Shouldn't the thread title be "Things that i have barryheard while out barrying"?

Thanks. I felt a bit awkward bringing it up myself.

You're barry welcome. Or should I say; barry barry baryycome.

i was in the city centre today. On my way back, i heard a woman and a man arguing near the taxi place. She called him a d*ckhead. He called her a sl*g. Then they walked near the bus station and she said You called me a f***ing liar in mcdonald's. They were near me for a bit and i was glad when they both went off in a different direction and i was no longer near them. The weird thing is that they both seemed to enjoy arguing as they kept following each other so they could argue even more.

Here are some things that i've overheard in the past couple of months.

i was on the toilet in BHS in December and i heard two old women talking about the shopping centre that we've had since November. They were moaning about Debenhams and Schuh being too expensive. Then i was near the café in BHS and i heard a woman say to another woman that she met a Polish woman that said that Polish people call Britain Treasure Island.

Something that Marc said that he heard a while ago, was a woman talking to children about having ham for Christmas. Except he heard that after Christmas.

A few weeks ago, i heard the security guard in Tesco talking to another male worker. He said to the security guard I'm the best packer. Then the security guard said how old he was when he moved here. i can't remember how old he said he was, though. i think it might have been something like 14.

i was in the city centre on Thursday and i heard a woman on her phone. She said You should send him a letter about school. He'll sh*t himself.

When i was on a coach on the 29th of February, we stopped for a few minutes. A woman and man talked about how they don't usually stop. They meaning the coach company. Woman - They didn't stop when we went to Monmouth. They should make up their bl**dy minds. They didn't stop when we went at C-mas. Perhaps it's a new thing but never mind.
A man on the phone said Yeah, I'll be in work at half past 10. I'll give you a call. Tara, butt.
A man on the phone said There's nothing going on there in April. Easter, isn't it? Yeah, that's true. Tomorrow and tonight.
A man on the phone said Five days. Then he laughed. Then he said They look good and they smell strong. OK, my love. See you later, bye bye.

When i was in the coach station in Birmingham on the 29th of February, I heard a man say They must be on holiday. They look like f***ing tourists.

When i was on another coach, there were three men and they were going to work on a building site. One was from North Wales and one was from Sheffield. The man from North Wales said he'd worked in France and Spain. They also talked about smoking, poker and the Euro exchange rate. One of them said that French people speak better English than English people. One of them said the same about Dutch people. i can't remember which one said which. The third man didn't say much so i don't know where he was from.
A woman on the phone talked about the airport. She said I should be there in 5 minutes.
The coach driver said I'm in the middle of it. And the man on the phone to him said There will be a delay on the way to Birmingham.
A woman getting off the coach said Bye, babe, have a good time. Be safe. Bye.

On the 3rd of March, i was at Birmingham coach station and there were some Welsh women. They ended up going on the coach to Wolverhampton. One of the women said By here. Then she said something about getting a magazine.
A woman said to a woman in an orange dress See you next week.
When i was on the coach, a woman and a man talked about shoes. Then they talked about having an exclusive relationship.
On Monday, when i was in the city centre, i heard three men talking. i will call them Man A, Man B and Man C. i think that Man B and Man C were friends. Man A, to Man B - You kn*b. Man B, to Man A - F*** off, you c***. Man C, to Man A - You fat pr**k.
When i walked across the bridge on the way back, i heard two women talking about something to do with smells.

i was in Tesco yesterday and i heard some people singing Happy Birthday to someone called Michael.

Today, i heard a girl say They didn't get in until 2 in the morning. i saw a girl carrying crutches and singing a tune. When i was in Tesco today, i heard a man on the phone say It makes you not want to sleep in your bed at night. Also in Tesco, i heard a boy saying Liar.

Yesterday, Marc and i were in Sainsbury's. i heard an older, male worker say to a younger, male worker I know but Paul doesn't know that I know.

i told Marc and he said that he heard the older, male worker say I put your name on the list. And the younger, male worker said Yeah?.

Yesterday, i went to the quarry with Marc and Pearl the dog.

There were some teenagers and one of them, a girl, said Do you have gold?.

On the pavement on the way back, i saw two girls. And one of them said something about The Faraway Tree.

Yesterday, Marc said that he heard some woman in a Welshy accent saying I'm a rebel. So i joked that perhaps she was in the Rebel Alliance.

When i went out this morning, i heard a woman on a mobile phone say I spent most of the time on the phone to the p*ssing office.

Ereyesterday, i was in a queue in a shop and two women were arguing. i couldn't hear all of it but i remember that one of the women said Get stuffed, Paxo. And then she said B*tch.

When i went out yesterday, there was a boy on a bike and a woman, who was perhaps his mother.
The woman said You haven't got your coat on or anything. I hope it doesn't rain.
The boy said I don't care.
Then the woman said Well, I care.

Ereyesterday, i walked to the city centre and back.

There were some boys on bikes and the first boy/ Brandon sang You can ring my bell.
Then the second boy said And then, Brandon, you said You can blow my whistle.
First boy/ Brandon That's not what I said.
Second boy No but it was one of them.

A woman and a boy stood near Carphone Warehouse, which has closed down.
Boy Well, someone doesn't like Carphone Warehouse.
Woman Really.

First man She was kind of like, always seeing her mother.
Second man That's how it is.

Also, i heard a boy say to a woman Are you having a hot flush?.

Today, Marc said that he saw two men. The first was in his 20s/ 30s. And the second was in his 40s/ 50s. And the first man was telling the second man that he went to Cwmbran and he bought Farah jeans for £8 and a Farah T-shirt for £5.

Yesterday, Marc and i were at the comic book stall in the market. A man there was talking to the man that runs the stall. He said that he wrote to edwina currie. And he complained that you can get asthma medication on prescription but not diabetes medication. * But he said that edwina currie didn't reply.

* Or it might have been the other way round.

Today, i heard a girl say to a woman: How many years have you been alive?.

Yesterday, i heard an old woman in Smiths say: There's a load of bl**dy rubbish on the telly. Then she said Bl**dy internet companies.

i was in tesco yesterday and the woman at the till said something like You wouldn't expect to see wasps at 5 o'clock in the morning.

Yesterday, i heard a woman say Oh, ey up.

A couple of weeks ago, i was in tesco and two men that worked there were talking about a programme about the apocalypse.

Last Monday, i was in Friars Walk shopping centre and i heard a security guard there say to a woman Two Bentleys and a Rolls Royce from 1925.

Also last Monday, i heard a woman say I love her and I miss her.

On Friday, there were two men in the city centre. The first man said Have a nice Christmas then. The second man said Thanks, mate. And the first man said Tara.

Also on Friday, i heard a man say It's not exactly like food.

Today, i was in Sainsbury's and Marc said he heard a man say to a woman about a family Christmas tradition, where his father asks guests to bring an object and tell a story about it. And the man said And Colin brought a match and.

On Tuesday, i heard a woman say Tara, Giovanni.

On Tuesday, i was in Waterstones and there were two women at the tills. The first woman said I'm reading a sizzling Highland romance. Then the two women started talking about taking numbers. *

* i mentioned it to Marc and he said that he thought they meant ISBN.

Also on Tuesday, i saw a woman that had pink hair and ripped jeans. She said Because they think they're not being racial because they're foreigners themselves.

i would have thought it's mostly old people that use the word racial like that. But she was in her 20s.