SuperHyperUltraZine! - A Christmas Alternative (25th December 2011)

Posted In: Mega-Zine Letters. Reading This Thread:

oatibix

| 36 posts


25th Dec 2011 at 12:05 am

 
Well, it's not particularly festive,
But some of the subjectively best of,
The 'Ziners are back to amuse you,
So read on ahead if you choose to.
If you don't,
do so anyway.


Things I have done since 'Zine ended.
- Cried
- Moved on with my life
- My homework
- Remembered 'Zine
- Cried
- Tried a bagel (actually quite nice)
- Got off my moped and moped around the house mopping up my tears using a mop which mops
So what have you done?
The Shamrocking Bogman

>The real WLW has been frozen until the world needs him again (in 2042's nostalgic documentary 'I Loved The 'Zineties').
> Davord is enjoying an early retirement with his wives and girlfriend.
>Me, I've been poisoning bagels.


Psychology.
I am so nervous about making presentation for all my classes. My friend said I should try to imagine everyone is naked, but I could not! - I would be really blushy and embarrassed! It does not work! I am not sure it wolud work for anything, ever... I am really nervous and scared about spiders too, but I am not sure I should imagine they are naked... I could try to imagine they are wearing clothes, I think! - It is like, spiders with tiny spider socks and bobble hats. They are really cute and sweet, I think. They are not scary anymore. Yay!
From, Little Blue Fox. x.

>Imagining everyone naked got me through my public nudity trial. I just wish I'd worn clothes.

Still Got It.

Mega-recession in Ireland has forced me from job to job. I've been a portable device for propping up a carpenter, a portable device for propping up a builder, a portable device for propping up a plumber and a portable device for propping up a painter.
I've become a jack of all trades! Eh! What about that, then?! Hah! Comic Cash4Gold that is! Merry 'Zinemas!
Colonial Foot Soldier

>The Farmer, of course, already has a Jack.


4 shatella.

Yo, Sniggle-D by the Christmas tree,
Whatever has my G-irl gone and bought for me?
BRAP! UNWRAP! A rhyming dictionary!
Good for my rhymes, this rhyming dictionary!
I'm sorry, Shatella, I only got you some fries,
but they're still room temperature, rather nice,
Let's share them as we read my rhyming dictionary.
So thank U for the rhyming dictionary!
S. Wiggy/Snigg Wong/Sniggledywingwong


>I've never glimpsed, such Christmas depth, so lose your angst, or face the mulcts.


Cogito Ergo Sumone Else.

People have asked me recently "Colonial Foot Soldier, are you still alive?" Well, it's an interesting question. What is it to be alive? Can you be living, yet not truly feel alive? And after your death, can people's memories of you, and the impact you've had on their lives result in your persona still being alive? Are we our body and mind, or are we our experiences, our feelings and the lives we lead?
I mean the shortest and simplest answer to all that is that I'm not Colonial Foot Soldier. We just look similar.
Paddy Irishman

>The people who asked you looked similar too.


Jack Of One Line.

When i was at school, we did a production of Jack And The Beanstalk. It was called Up The Beanstalk and i played a peasant. All the other peasants had to exclaim about how big and amazing the beanstalk was. And then i said: "Personally, i think it's rather vulgar".
Although i only had one line, everyone kept saying it to me for weeks.
Smashed Strawberry, Hector's House

>Are you available for the Prime Minister's Questions?


I NEED YOUR URGENT RESPONSE.

àéDear,
I know that this letter may surprise, your address from the computerized search. My name is Mr Mr. Sekou Dany, Bill and Exchange (assistant) Manager of Bank of Africa Ouagadougou, Burkina Faso. I discovered an abandoned sum of $14.5MILLION in an account of one customer dead. All his supposed next of kin or relation died alongside with him in the plane crash. It is therefore I decided to make this business proposal to you.

Am contacting you because our deceased customer is a foreigner and a Burkinabe can not stand as a next of kin to foreign customer. I shall visit your country for my disbursement. Please I would like you to keep this transaction confidential and as a top secret as you may wish to know that I am a bank official.
Mr. Sekou Dany.

> Didn't the Teletext staff speak with you in early 2009?
buy oatibix
eat oatibix
have oatibix


 
 
Claire: FNSICLS NEXT FRIDAY 8PM OK BYE
Vel: I'm in!!
Πανδώρα: Beep beep. Its Tuesday.
Πανδώρα: It might be Wednesday by now. Not sure.
EvilTongs: It's definitely a day of some sort
Dinglebutt: Wednesday.... *takes long drag of cigarette*.... Now that's a name I've not heard in many a year.....
Claire: Pals and pals, it is FNSIC again tomorrow, please let me know if you need the details.
Πανδώρα: Testicle.
Claire: Hi guys, I’m Tess Ticle and welcome to my TED talk
Luco El Loco: Activity in 2020? Hooray, nice to see VR life.
Claire: I’d not go that far...a lovely lovely zombie perhaps
Luco El Loco: True.
EvilTongs: It was bizarre how a group of us spontaneously returned when the pandemic stuff kicked off.
Vel: Bizarre or playing the long game? Hmmm, Mr Tongs?
Bellatrixa: I'm just here to reset my password and go about my business, trying not to cringe too much at how I was affected by the abusive f*ckwit I was living with towards the end of my time on this site.
Πανδώρα: AAAARRRGHHH. That is all.
Claire: Lisa I love Lisa, kindest regards to Lisaaaaa
Crinkle-Cut Beatroot: Eating Jaffa Cakes thinking about WLW...
Πανδώρα: Beefy cheesemas to all, and to all a gravy brie

 

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