#0000076 FRIDAY 30TH NOVEMBER
heres todays zine for you:
Page 1/8
SUGARED VENOM: Why is it that when you finally get
what you want, you don't want it anymore but you want
something else? WLW: Just life, innit?
SIR WHENCE PITCHFORK: If the Big Bossman of Teletext
Ltd read this page, how long would we have left? WLW:
I reckon about 20 minutes, so pack yer bags and run!
THE ONE WITH THE MIGTHY ANTLERS: My English supply
teacher looks like Afroman. This worries me. What
should I do? WLW: Change schools, and quick.
Page 2/8
WLW
I have worked out your little scheme! If someone asks
for say, a toaster, they get something else, like a
24-in-1 Swiss Army Knife.
Therefore, I won't ask for what I want you to draw.
So, WLW, can you please NOT draw me an orange teapot?
Please, do NOT draw me one!
Satan's Rubber Duck
WLW: Ok, but only cos I can't do orange! However,
blue? We like? Fetching?
(It's really quite nice by the way)
Page 3/8 (well, well, well, look who it is)
B*CKCH*T
You can now text B*ckch*t, when will we get this? I
know some Ziners (Pluggy!) think mobiles are for
Trendies, but I love mine with its kids TV ringtones,
300 free texts a month (which I use for Zine) and
free email (which is what I'm using to send this
message!)
What do you think WLW? When can we text Zine?
Fluffy The Evil One
WLW: The words 'hell' and 'freezes' spring to mind!
Mobiles are evil!
Page 4/8
DAVORD
Are you controlling my mind? Today, in college, I
wrote down the day was Thargsday. Does Davord want a
day all of his own of something?
I need an eighth day of the week, There's never enough
time to do college work and important things like
watching TV, sleeping, eating and lazing around.
Can we adopt Davord as Patron Saint of all 'Ziners
while I'm here?
Black Widow
WLW: I'd ask him but, frankly, all he does is laze
around every day anyway.
Page 5/8
HOW TO KNOW WHEN YOU'VE MADE IT
Sure-fire ways to know you've made your name as an
established 'Ziner;
1 You get a picture at the bottom of your screen
2 A 'Ziner puts you on the list of 'If 'Ziners were;'
3 A B*ckch*tter uses your name
4 WLW remembers who you are
And none of these have happened yet! Oh well, there's
no such thing as instant fame, I suppose.
Girl On The Oatmeal Box
WLW: I DO remember you though, you're the, you, no,
sorry, it's gone.
Page 6/8
ATTENTION BEVERAGE DRINKERS!
With the Dandelion and Burdock debate gripping the
nation, I beg you not to overlook the humblest of
drinks: our good friend, lime cordial.
The humblest of all beverages, he brings refreshment
to the sweaty ones on summer days and gas to those who
drink in excess. So, next time you drink D+B, don't
forget our good friend, the lime. I know his brother
and he ain't pretty.
The Suited Strangler
WLW: Oooh lime cordial, surely THE best, and so much
you can put in it!
Page 7/8
CAREERS, Y SO HARD?
WLW, why is it so hard to find a career in life? MY
brother made it, he sells windmills to miniature
golfcourses, but I'm pushing buttons like a
chimpanzee!
I wanna dance! I wanna be a dancer! NOTHINGS GONNA
STOP ME!
Avant Guard Dog
WLW: I wanted to work for Cadbury's, but look at me
now? Ok, bad example.
Page 8/8
YEEEEEEEEEEEE HAWWWWWW!!!!
Ahm back and ahm mad. Yes-sirree.
Brigadier, you side-windin', yellow-bellied no good
son of a prairie dawg! Yer think yer can bust in here
with yer greenhorn tenderfoot talk an' start pushin'
folks around?
Well now you've got me to deal with. Every time I
polish ma six-gun, its you I'm a-thinkin' of. Now
draw!
Wild Bill Hiccup
WLW: Suddenly, I feel like I'm in a parallel universe.
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