'Zine Thing

Posted In: Mega-Zine Chat. Reading This Thread:


| 10,038 posts

28th Feb 2009 at 11:04 pm

Colin -

I wrote a song about Mega-Zine...
You can listen to it on my MySpace.
If you have an aversion to that, maybe you'd prefer to stream from last.fm (free download there).

Here are the lyrics, but I implore you to listen without reading them first.

Since way back in 1993,
We've written letters to our TVs,
Then waited for updates at our screens,
To read it and it's called Mega-Zine.

In Fulham lives a clever giraffe,
A monkey and two cats are his staff,
He helps provide us with daily laughs,
He separates the good from the naff -

- and who can afford -
To forget about that Lord of Tharg, Davord?

What's this nonsense here - that I'm reading?
Man, you wouldn't understand: it's a 'Zine thing.
People acting strange, and then exceeding.
It's a 'Zine thing.
Striving for humour - sometimes succeeding.
Don't say it's no good - 'cause that's misleading.
The daily dose of laughter we were needing.
It's a 'Zine thing.

For sixteen years, the misfit mobs,
Of lonely nerds and homely slobs,
Just worship this page like a god,
It was either that or pursuing jobs.

The pages would display our reports,
Our rants and puns and whimsical thoughts,
And WLW flaunts,
His cunning in cynical retorts.

And I see newbies on Page 3,
Abjuring their place in society.

What's this nonsense here - that I'm reading?
Man, you wouldn't understand: it's a 'Zine thing.
People acting strange, and then exceeding.
It's a 'Zine thing.
Mabel Mop is famous for her cleaning.
That part there's the hook, so it's repeating.
Now an interlude from Sniggledywingwong.

"Yo! Mega-zine, it talks to the kids,
The plain damn strange, the invalids,
The 'Zine's overseen by a lean, spotted, unseen Queen, then it's beamed to my screen by machines.
And in addition
It's my addiction
Reading it daily has become a tradition
Let us not forget the serial fiction
that our Mega-Zine has brought to fruition
Townie Tim, yeah, Matt Fatt,
Argyle businesses, Sprinkles the Cat,
Even if you think that 'Zine isn't all that,
It's still far better than writing to B******t.
So, Teletext, what happens next?
Frankly, I'm perplexed."

The 'Zine is over now, despite our pleading,
They don't know what they are superseding,
We have to let it go, we are conceding.
But I'd still welcome a legal proceeding.

What's this nonsense here that we were reading?
Man, you wouldn't understand: it's a 'Zine thing.
People acting strange, and then exceeding.
It's a 'Zine thing.

It's a 'Zine thing.


| 764 posts

1st Mar 2009 at 2:31 am

Griff - (indoors)


God I love it. Good job Colin, very good job. :')


| 8,154 posts

1st Mar 2009 at 2:45 am

wombat - Technically sexy.

Technically sexy.

This is great!
Southern hemispherical rat boy


| 764 posts

1st Mar 2009 at 3:36 am

Griff - (indoors)


I think this deserves some sort of prize. You talented, talented b*st*rd.
Where's my talent, I ask in vain.

Anyway, is there anything you want from Spain?


| 10,038 posts

1st Mar 2009 at 4:51 am

Colin -

I didn't mean to cause you pain,
But yes, I'd like some Madrid cocaine.

Insane Jam Sow

| 443 posts

1st Mar 2009 at 7:17 pm

Insane Jam Sow - Bill Bryson is my God

Bill Bryson is my God

This is by far the best thing I have ever head in my entire life. And I'm not a man prone to exaggeration.

Hats off to you, sir. WLW will hear this and it will blow his mind. Once again, fantastic job!

Yes, my website still exists. Just about.

Little Blue Fox.

| 4,256 posts

1st Mar 2009 at 7:32 pm

Little Blue Fox. - Hope is important.

Hope is important.

Oh my goodness! It is really amazing!
It hurts too much not to try.
I will see you in another life when we are both cats.
Quod perditum est, in venietur.*Facebook.


| 10,038 posts

1st Mar 2009 at 8:24 pm

Colin -

I'm glad you enjoy it!

It's annoying that I've really noticed the compromises 128kb/s compression causes to some of my songs lately, but I'll keep them at that bitrate for consistency and because they're hardly hi-fi anyway.

I've sent WLW the link, but I've decided to also send him a CD copy 'cause that's a lot better than a silly download.


| 764 posts

1st Mar 2009 at 8:29 pm

Griff - (indoors)


Use my "artwork"? I don't know if anyone noticed the white line... as in the warrior... Nevermind.


| 10,038 posts

1st Mar 2009 at 8:43 pm

Colin -

Oh, clever.
If I can be bothered to pay to print it, yes. If not, well, no.

Mancomb Seepgood

| 3,455 posts

1st Mar 2009 at 9:58 pm

Mancomb Seepgood - Grog me.

Grog me.

Properly brilliant. In proper ways. Props.
If I could get an orange that was as low-maintenance as an apple, I'd be a happy man


| 764 posts

1st Mar 2009 at 10:28 pm

Griff - (indoors)


Quote: Lilac_Leopard
Here is a pictoral representation of my thoughts about Colin. I think it's time for a Colin fanclub.


Captain Mal Reynolds

| 11,852 posts

2nd Mar 2009 at 8:46 am

Captain Mal Reynolds - I aim to misbehave

I aim to misbehave

Barry fully endorses this point or product.

We could call it "Colins Uniquely Non-sensical Talent Supporters Club"
Mal: Appears we got here just in the nick of time. What does that make us?
Zoƫ: Big damn heroes, sir.
Mal: Ain't we just.


| 1,786 posts

2nd Mar 2009 at 11:55 am

"Colin's Lovely and Incredibly Talented, Or the Regional/International Society of colin fans."

You can't escape the C.L.I.T.O.R.I.S.ocf.

Luco El Loco: Greetings and salutations for anyone passing through.
SayNotAWord: Does this thing still work?
SayNotAWord: Oh good - I ended up here at the end of a Mega Zine nostalgia rabbit hole
SayNotAWord: Nice to see there's still life in this glorious old place
SayNotAWord: It's ya boy, Parsley Possum
Luco El Loco: Hello
Luco El Loco: Wow I haven't heard that one in a while.
Crinkle-Cut Beatroot: I was in the shower and "Fluff The Evil One" randomly floated through my mind so I thought I'd stop by, hi 'ziners!
Captain Spiky: Considering I haven't been on this site for over a decade, I find it mildly terrifying that I still have an average of 1.71 posts per day...
Captain Spiky: I miss this place... Much loveage to anybody reading this x
Graham: Passing through, hope you beautiful lot are doing well!
Rayanne Graff: Bye; peace to small Christmas trees.
Crinkle-Cut Beatroot: Friday night just thinkin' about sharing jaffa cakes with WLW... <3
Maeby: Almost 4 years. Where did the time go?
Pope of Chilli Town: Time flies Alice.
Rayanne Graff: Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. Peace to small Christmas trees.
flicky: I'm back, 11 years on