mortality and truthfulness

Posted In: Rants. Reading This Thread:

clivey_baby

| 0 posts


20th Oct 2002 at 12:58 pm

 
when i was younger a man pasted out in front of me in the street
id dunked off to camden with sum friends and noone knew i was there
at first i thought he was p*ssed (as most the ppl who are in camden usually are)
i sat and watched him for a bit then walked over (i didnt go over straight away cos its very unwise to approach drunks in the streets, cosa ive had experiences of that be4)
i sort of asked him if he was alright and as i was sort of shaking his shoulder gently he rolled over and half of his face was missing, there was blood everywhere, a matter of seconds later i was surounded by ambulance crew
it turned out that he bin hit by a car just round trhe cornor andf stumbled this way for help
i was questioned for hours
it was quite a weird experience
ive experienced that feeling a couple of times now, and darren i know exactly what you mean
the overwhelming fear that you could die and noone wud really know who you are
i felt like that for a good few years
though now i have concluded that noone really stands a chance at knowing me aswell i aqs i wud ever have hoped so now i just give up on that
i used to write a diary of my thorts but i cudnt explain well enough
im hounored you consider me a friend
il see you soon
buy you a few drinks

clivey_baby

| 0 posts


20th Oct 2002 at 1:32 pm

 
[quote=Sammy_Davis_Jr_ link=1035082903/0#3 date=1035119511]

ill hold you to that

1929

| 2,016 posts


20th Oct 2002 at 2:17 pm

 
Hope you're alright girlpants, haven't spoken to ye in a while, I'll drop you an email sometime.
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goNg

Caged Liberty

| 11,209 posts


20th Oct 2002 at 10:05 pm

Caged Liberty - Torrential high seas dragged me to my knees

Torrential high seas dragged me to my knees

 
Come and talk to me the next time you're in MSN please.

Love
Laura
x

"It's never too late to be what you might have been"

Quote:

but yes, i need to tell someone about me, i need someone to know me so intimatly it hurts ... i guess im scared that something could happen before anyone ever truly knows me now... maybe its too late, i dont know, i barely know myself so how can any one get to know me on such an intimate level if i dont know myself .... hmmmmm

outcast

| 0 posts


23rd Oct 2002 at 11:12 am

 
its strange, but.... before i saw death (ive seen and smelled .. yes that is the worst memory of my life... more times then i would have liked) i was scared of dieing, sometimes i would just suddenly get hit with the thought, im gonna die one day, i dont think it was a fear of death, that hit me, and made everything freeze... but a frar of looseing myself and everything ive done... that scared me. what if i dont do all i want. thats my true fear.

after i saw death i became.. less afraid... like i , i now know what it is... i think its the fear of no knowing that hi me most

i dont wanna die, and i hope i have a lot of time to do all the things i wanna do , and to get to know all the people i want to know, and to find someone to share myself with. but when it comes i wont fear it. not now anyway.

i just hope that people remember me.

i wanna know you , darren and clivey and all the other people here. i wnna know you all, and i wanna spend and share some of my life, my good and bad times with you, thats why i came to vr i suppose, it was.. a hope that.. i would find someone elce who would understand, and ... i wouldnt have to be alone anymore...

hikey

| 5,865 posts


23rd Oct 2002 at 11:39 am

its the semi automatic stun gun!!!!!!!!!!!! yeehaw

 
even if there was a fully qualified theatre nurse in the pub at the time when this guy had the heart attack its no guarentee hed ve made it.

i know how you mean about not wanting to die with things as they are ~its like unfinished things need doing saying truth is man it is always like this you will always be unprepared to die even if you set the date something will be missed you never did something never said something

if you are holding back





dont




but dont stop holding back




through FEAR OF DEATH

dying with out knowing dying without telling



stop holding back through FEAR OF LIVING

living a life true to yourself without hiding lieing pretending
a wasted oppurtunity to be yourself isnt a wasted oppurtunity which occurs in death its in life


im sounding like a prick so i will make a comparrison which is no reflection on your situation~~

so many ppl live there whole lives afraid of being true to themselves that they deny themselves so much like the gay guy who marries the first girl who says hes nice enough and dies wishing he had allowed himself the chance to be who he was not who he thought he should be

im not saying its that~ im not even saying its close.

but dead ppl and death and loss are nasty scary sh*t and it always makes me feel like im letting the dead ppl down by not living well enough sorry if this was way too dumb im sort of trying to express something but i dont know if the words here are too sh*tty i look stoopid


he aint all there he dont like beans!!!!!!!!!!!

outcast

| 0 posts


23rd Oct 2002 at 11:43 am

 
dont be sorry hikey, be prowed of what you say, its what you believe or think and therefore its not wrong...

and it was well said, although the gaps were a bit big.. lol

hikey

| 5,865 posts


23rd Oct 2002 at 11:49 am

its the semi automatic stun gun!!!!!!!!!!!! yeehaw

 
[quote=DaRKWOLF_ link=1035082903/0#10 date=1035373394]dont be sorry hikey,
he aint all there he dont like beans!!!!!!!!!!!

outcast

| 0 posts


23rd Oct 2002 at 11:53 am

 
oh ok...

well stay , open to thought , and dont be sorry about what you say aslong as its not out of hatered or anger its all cooolllll

hikey

| 5,865 posts


25th Oct 2002 at 11:46 am

its the semi automatic stun gun!!!!!!!!!!!! yeehaw

 
you are f*cking optimistic man *BOLDYELLOW* *BOLDYELLOW*which is good
he aint all there he dont like beans!!!!!!!!!!!

hikey

| 5,865 posts


25th Oct 2002 at 11:54 am

its the semi automatic stun gun!!!!!!!!!!!! yeehaw

 
darren man i have a theory but im not gonna share it with you as it will offend



hugs though


sh*t man sorry i shouldnt have said this but if im right you know what i mean
he aint all there he dont like beans!!!!!!!!!!!

hikey

| 5,865 posts


27th Oct 2002 at 2:31 pm

its the semi automatic stun gun!!!!!!!!!!!! yeehaw

 
okay but i mean no offence by it
he aint all there he dont like beans!!!!!!!!!!!


 
 
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