Quote: Paddy_Irishmanoh, we have to add some steven wright lines too
I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone
Is it weird in here, or is it just me?
It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to have to paint it
Cross country skiing is great if you live in a small country
My VCR flashes 01:35, 01:35, 01:35, ...
I'm writing an unauthorized autobiography
Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time
I reckon you're onto a winner there.
Additionally, Jack Handy quotes would be brilliant, but they're mostly all too long.
"One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my nephew to Disneyland, but instead I drove him to an old burned-out warehouse. "Oh no," I said, "Disneyland burned down." He cried and cried, but I think that deep down he thought it was a pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real Disneyland, but it was getting pretty late."
"If you ever fall off the Sears Tower, just go real limp, because maybe you'll look like a dummy and people will try to catch you because, hey, free dummy."
"To me, it's always a good idea to always carry two sacks of something when you walk around. That way, if anybody says, "Hey, can you give me a hand?," you can say, "Sorry, got these sacks.""